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Monday 22 October 2012

Emotionally coping with an Amputation ?

     

 YOU  HAVE  MADE  THE  RIGHT  CHOICE !   

        When you have made the big decision to remove your dogs limb, you are so wrapped up with all the various thought streams, that are flowing through your brain ? That once the decision has been made and your vets have taken over, and your dog is due to have their limb removed.  You are left feeling totally drained and completely numb, and in this sort of  LIMBO . The fact that you have had to make the decision goes against everything, that we thought what is a good Pet Owner should do or be  ??

          But let me tell you that making the decision of amputation IS being a good Pet Owner, there is nothing that upsets me more than when I read people comments that that removal of a leg is Cruel or Their dog does not look like it is in pain ?? Fizz would never have shown us that she was in Pain, and she would have continued to suffer in silence. Without showing an outward sign of the total agony, that she must have felt with that Cancer growing larger by the day.

          The removal of the affected limb, will once the healing from the amputation is completed ..... will remove this constant pain that your dog was suffering daily. Please believe me when I say that the non ~ removal of that limb is nothing more than that of  Cruelty, and then you would be a  Bad Pet Owner ?  So this means that the hardest choice that you have had to make since deciding on buying a puppy, This is the   RIGHT  CHOICE.

          The fact that you know deep inside you that your pet is hurting, then the decision of amputation is a easy one to make. Because you love your pet and you don't want them to suffer, this is the right choice  I know its hard to comprehend or get your head around. But you have made completely the right  CHOICE  for your Pet,and when you see your pet after a few days after the amputation you will  KNOW  that it was the right choice and your heart will start to beat easier.
 
THE  REALISATION  THAT  YOUR  PET  IS  VERY  ILL.....
    
           When I first found out that Fizz had Bone Cancer, I knew that she would have to have her leg removed quickly, so I was lucky because I had already had, that thought inside my mind. It must be harder on those of you who haven't heard about Bone Cancer, or what it means to your beloved pet. This was one of my main reasons for Starting this  BLOG  !  So that I could try to help people who are given this awful new's and don't understand what it means for you, or more importantly means for  YOUR  PET .

           The emotional drain on a caring pet owner once they discover that their Pet is not going to Survive is a totally devastating one . I know I lived it, when I was told that firstly Fizz would die in 4 weeks time, had I done nothing ........ almost destroyed me. I couldn't imagine nor wished to contemplate my life without my big girl in my life ............ because she was my life ??  It seems strange to think like this especially as I had  2 other Dogs, a husband and 2 children. 

           But Fizz and I were connected totally and completely, if you have not had this connection with an animal. It is hard for me to explain to you , but I think if you are out there looking for help and information for your Dog / Pet. Then maybe you already know exactly what I'm talking about and where I'm coming from, so you are just like me  HEART  BROKEN !!   I can't tell you that its going to get better after reading this page,because I would be lying if I said that.  

           I want you to know that I understand that feeling of helplessness and the total WHY  MY  DOG ?  I can Honestly say that I don't know why.
         
           But I do know that you will realise a couple of days after the amputation, that you have made the  RIGHT  CHOICE  for your pet. The thought that even though your pet is having to go through this Major Operation and is still not going to be totally cured, or miraculously healed is something that is hard to realise or live through. 

          This is the cruellest part of this awful disease and something that I myself found very hard to get my head around. Was that even though Fizz was going through the surgery of her leg removal it wouldn't stop her Cancer, nor stop the fact that I was going to lose her. But I knew that the removal of Fizz's leg would for a SHORT time it would ............

 A )  Remove the PAIN that Fizz was dealing with.

 B )  Give me MORE TIME with my Best Friend.

       These are the main reason's that I allowed the Amputation, and something that helped me to make the decision and gave me some Solace. I hope that reading this may in some way help you come to term's, with the the horrific realisation that an amputation will actually be better for your beloved Pet. I hope I give you peace of mind, that removing the limb will benefit your pet and allow you to spend more time with a member of your family, whom you're not willing to lose just yet ?

THIS  IS  YOUR  TIME  TO  BE  STRONG  FOR  YOUR  PET !  

                As I have told you before Fizz and I had this amazing bond or connection and whenever I was upset by something or feeling down. Fizz would be the one who I would turn to, I would go into the garden and just sit down, she would sit next to me and would just be there ........... we did not have to say a word she would always put her right paw, on top of my left foot and she would stay there, not moving. She was my strength, Best Friend, and its something that I find very difficult to put down onto paper or tell you all in my Blog.

       It's because of her and her strength and undying spirit that has made it possible to be here telling you her story. I want her Life to mean something , her life means something to everyone whoever met her but ......... its more than that. I want her story to be leading light and a lil bit of hope, for other people and pets that are suffering from this debilitating disease. Fizz was an incredible dog who suffered through many things, and she never lost herself, she was always just my Fizz. 

       Her attitude could have been changed so many times, through her life with everything that she went through, but it didn't. Its this enduring spirit that I feel needs to be shared and I hope it will give other's the ability to see past this CANCER and be able to realise that no ~ matter what your dog looks like.  Their true character will never change, and even with an amputation your pet will always be yours. The strength that your dog will show you, the remarkable acceptance of whatever may come into their lives. They never feel sorry for themselves and will never have a chip on their shoulder or Woe is ME ?? 

      Your pet will have been there for you as well, I'm sure they have and they have sat next to you when you have been at a low point in your life. Animals have this ability to feel, to feel how you are feeling instantly, they don't need to be told why you feel sad or ask what is the matter ?? They just know, they don't care if you haven't brushed your hair or your not in your Sunday Best, they don't judge you ever. 

              Animals are Totally Un~Selfish they don't Do Something to Get Something ! They just want you to feel better and if sitting by you for an hour means you will get better, they do it willingly and without a hidden agenda. They will do it just because they LOVE YOU ! Its as simple as that, Now this is your chance to give back. This is the moment that your dog's life so far has led up to, all those times when they gave out love to you. This is the time for you to be there for your dog, totally and just for the reason that you LOVE your pet and you know they need  YOU NOW !

SEEING  YOUR  DOG  FOR  THE  FIRST  TIME  AFTER  THEIR   AMPUTATION  ???                                                  
           
           The day after Fizz had her 6 hour operation to remove her leg, I received a phone call from my vet Sian . I was told that they had tried to get her standing up and she had not reacted well to them, so could I come in as they would not be trying again until I was there ???    Their actual comment was    "We tried to move her and she growled at us so we're not trying again until you get here !!!!! "

          My Fizzly was a huge Rottweiler , with Rottweiler attitude and if she felt that she could get away with a lil grumble to be left alone ............ she would grumble ! She would never have tried it with me as she knew I'd have given her a sharp poke, or a clip round the ear ! I will go into how Sian our Vet learn't how to deal with Rottweilers by being around me and Fizz later. I will make a page for controlling a dog just by being a certain  ENERGY  on this site and my other Blog    http://zenas-doggytails-help-and-tips.blogspot.co.uk/   I will also talk about Sian and Fizz teachings on other Parts in  Fizz's  Story  Parts  that are found on the side of this Page, but as usual I'm going off topic !!

        Getting back to this page ........ We left instantly as I wanted to be with Fizz asap as I needed to be with her, to see how she was doing as I hadn't seen her since before her operation. Even though I knew she was having the amputation, I'd taken her there the morning before. I had even signed the form allowing them to take off her leg, all of this I knew, but I still was in the  Dream ~ Like state  of what the " Hell "  was going on !!!
           
          I didn't know what I would see when I got there, and the sick feeling of  O.M.G  was just running through my entire being. I don't know what I thought would greet me when I saw her for the first time ?? I didn't know if I'd start crying or not be able to look at her minus leg ? One thing I did know was that I wouldn't be able show Fizz, how bad I was feeling deep inside my gut. I knew that I could not treat her any differently or otherwise it would effect her state of mind, and if I collapsed then how could she maintain herself and remain strong ........ ?

           We got to the Vets and Sian and Emma the Nurse were waiting for our arrival ?? We went inside the Surgery, complete with our Cot Bumper Blanket and that's when I knew !  I suddenly knew how I should be, its was amazing and in a strange way spiritual,  Now I'm not a religious nut !!       I believe that there is a higher power, and I believe at time of great stress our paths are lightened by a Guide be it Spiritual or not ......  But I know that at that time my panic and sickness evaporated, and I suddenly saw what I should be doing and how I could best help My Fizzly.

            I walked into the Back Hospital and there in a bottom cage was my Fizzles, the EMPTY SPACE where her leg should have been was the most graphic scene I had ever witnessed. It left me totally bereft of how this young dog ( 6 years old )  had gone through all of this, and must have been in a whole lot of pain. I just stood by the doorway, taking in the sight of my dog without her back leg,

          I had to swallow my emotions and I knew I needed to walk into that room, as if it was the most normal sight in the world. I had to pretend that it was just another day in the Fizzle's and Me Life Stories !!! and the leg removal was just as normal, as Fizz going to the vets for her yearly inoculation's. So that's what I did I walked into the room and this dog My Fizzles, who I  LOVED  TOTALLY !! My Fat Lump saw me walk into the room and her eye's lit up and her lil tail started wiggling.

         I just walk up to the cage and just bend down to give her kisses !! and this Rottweiler started crawling on her front legs and managed to pull herself closer to me ! I bend down to her and she pushes her head under my hand in the proper Rottweiler way, and we stay like that for a few moments, 

Saying nothing and Feeling everything ~ just as normal. 

        I then say " Ok Fattie its time to get up "  Just as if she was perfectly normal and not missing a leg ! and that's how I did it ........... I just acted, and it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. I faked it totally, I wanted to curl up next to her and just burst into tear's, But I knew that I couldn't do that I had to be strong ...... I had to pretend that nothing had changed I had to FAKE IT !!

       I loved that dog to pieces, and the fact that she had always been strong for me, and had always looked after me and my family.  It was my time to repay her, for all that she had done for me and I was honoured to do so. I then moved her head off my leg, put her lead on her and I got up,

 then I just said " Ok Fizzly GET  UP !!! " 

That Dog gritted her teeth squeaked a lil bit as she turned herself a bit so that her remaining Back leg was under her .......... and she just  " GOT  UP " Sian and Emma rushed around to put the Cot Bumper under her Tummy just in case she fell ........... and then I said Ok Let's Go ??


With that She Started Walking ..............

                  My Fizzly 2 Days after her Operation !

         


5 comments:

  1. I so understand about the first time you see them after the surgery. I try to prep people for that. I had even been with other dogs just after surgery but seeing my big tall great dane missing one if his very, very long back legs was heart stopping. Those are the times when we call on our inner reserves to lift us up and help us keep it together.
    I had another fabulous 17 months with the love of my life, my heart dog, following his amputation. His cancer never returned however the strain of 3 legging it took its toll of his spine. He had wobblers syndrome and had nerve impingement in a front leg so it was quite the miracle that he could even 3 leg it at all.
    Thanks for sharing your story of your journey with Fizz.

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    1. Thank you so much for your lovely message and I have been visiting your blog about Zane and he was absolutely Gorgeous <3

      I Totally understand as I had seen other amputated Dogs before Fizzles but the shock when its your own is mind blowing and completely devastating :)


      Like Zane, My Fizzles had the big breed status and this was what led to her final battle ending, as her opposing front leg began to fail :(

      But her courage and attitude throughout her Cancer Battle, made my coping during the whole process a whole lot easier ..... but Losing her was that much more Heartbreaking <3

      But this Blogging has given me a reason to continue and I will try to help others, and I do it all through My Fizzly's Name :) <3 xoxox

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  2. Hi, this is the admin for the Champion the 3 Legged Dog page...this story is amazing...I love Fizzly's courage through the whole thing and I admire how you stayed strong when you went to go see her for the first time with 3 legs. You are amazing! :)

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  3. Thank you so much for such a lovely comment :)

    My Fizzly was the one with all the Courage and Spirit <3 I just tried to keep up with her unbelievable acceptance, of everything that she faced, while I watch on with a heart full of Awe :) xoxox

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  4. What a lovely story; than you for sharing. My girl Sasha was diagnosed with bone cancer last year on March 6th. My husband and I have been sharing her story on my little blog, http://lilisnotes.com/category/the-pack/sasha.

    Dogs are amazing. They are a great example of how (in my opinion) we humans should be more like :)

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